These are actual ads from the Lonely Hearts pages of 'Ireland 's Own'


Heavy drinker, 35, Cork area. Seeks gorgeous sex addict interested in a man who loves his pints, cigarettes, Glasgow Celtic Football Club and has been known to start fights on Patrick Street at three o'clock in the morning.

Donegal man, 50, in desperate need of a ride. Anything considered.

Grossly overweight Louth turf-cutter, 42 years old, Gemini, seeks nimble sex-pot, preferably South American, for tango sessions, candlelit dinners and humid nights of screaming passion. Must have own car and be willing to travel.

Limerick man, 27, medium build, brown hair, blue eyes, seeks alibi for the night of February 27 between 8 PM and 11:30 PM.

Artistic Clare woman, 53, petite, loves rainy walks on the beach, poetry, unusual sea-shells and interesting brown rice dishes, seeks mystic dreamer for companionship, back rubs and more as we bounce along like little tumbling clouds on life's beautiful crazy journey. Strong stomach essential.

Ginger haired Galway man, a troublemaker, gets slit-eyed and ****ty after a few scoops, seeks attractive, wealthy lady for bail purposes, maybe more.

Bad tempered, foul-mouthed old *******, living in a damp cottage in the arse end of Roscommon, seeks attractive 21 year old blonde lady with a lovely chest.

Optimistic Mayo man, 35, seeks a blonde 20 year old double-jointed super model, who owns her own brewery and has an open-minded twin sister.

Following a sad recent loss, teetotal Tipperary man, 53, seeks
replacement mammy. Must like biscuits and answer to the name Minnie. Thurles area.

Bitter, disillusioned Dublin man, lately rejected by longtime fiancée, seeks decent, honest, reliable woman, if such a thing still exists in this cruel world of hatchet-faced bitches.

This name sounds familiar. Does the ad also mention a profligate uncle with equal if not greater needs?

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's git nüt wo's nid git u aus wo's git git's nid für ging, me nimmt's woe's chunnt u lat's la gah.

how can you not like the Irish?? when you see that.

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trust no one

This guy stole my ad, I have it posted every week in as many places as I can. She'll find me eventually.

I Swear i didnt place this ad ..... Honest !!! but ive gotta love his sense of humour and his live in hope attitude :-)

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Dont let the Bastrads grind ya down

jaysus what a wild bunch they are, just love it, they are so honest !!!

The point is Sada, is that it is not honest or to be taken literally as if it were a Swiss advert like : boring-balding-polo-neck-jumper-navy-boot-clad-bore-requires-uptight-swiss-lady-for-no-fun-at-all. It is called irony and used most likely in this context to bewitch a female with an attempt at cheeky-chappy-charm through humour.

BigD

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You make your own luck.

www.shootingthecheese.ch
The place for fun and chat in Switzerland.

I love to be bewitched.

I don't understand this thread ....

There are reasons why I left the men in Ireland when I moved here......

Many of them are demonstrated in the opening post