“Achtung! Er Kommst… Er Kommst! Remain seated and no applauseth, for die Master is nothing but Humble!“

Dr Derv is here to help you with all your problems and help you understand all the Misstries of this life and the world around. From Cosmological to Ontological… Philosophical to Psychological… Emotional to Logical… Ornithology to Anthropology… Demography to Geography… Bill Clinton to Tiger Woods… Being adopted by Woody Allen to Being adopted by Madonna… Gravititional Pull to Animal Attraction… Falling in Love to Falling in Ditch… there is NO issue Dr Derv has not “touched upon” and is not well versed with.

“Ahooaay… All ye heareth and all ye beareth and broadcasteth far and wide”

Dr Derv has spent one of his lives learning Wisedoom from the Wholly Man standing on no leg on top of the cold harsh peaks of Himalayas and the Wishcraft from the eternal Maidens of Mosuo in their Flower Chambers around Lake Lugu. Another life learning Kung FU from the Masters in Shaolin to inducing the Warrior Spirit from the legendary White Slaves of Georgia.

On the break of Spring, while learning Katas from a Samurai Maestro in the Dojo of Okinawa on condition to vow silence all through the time, the Maestro asked “Ima nan ji desu ka” and Dr Derv replied, modestly ofcourse, “Sensei Ima Haru ga kita ji desu” to which the Sensei was overwhelmed with emotions at such a Truer answer and offered his Katana, funny name for his daughter. Dr Derv had chosen a life of abstinence and kindly declined saying “My Katana has no sheath.” Sensei replied “Unsheathed Katana is dangerous to all” Dr Derv wisely replied “Why must the sheath suffer the danger either?”

From there on Dr Derv has been greeted with Sawasdee by Ladies of Far East, learning Waikiki Sneaky from the Hula girls of Honolulu, singing Maori songs, sailing True in the oceans of this life, with his unshaken Chakra as the Lighthouse for guidance.

Dr Derv even had the honour of meeting Kama and Sutra, both, and pioneered the concept of applying their Positions in the NYSE trading floor. Whilst his stay in the Big Apple, with his small banana, he was the Chief Editor of Moron’s Monthly and W*nkers Weekly publications.

“Halt and jest ye not! For there is lot to be learn from the ways of unwise. Don’t doeth what they doeth”

And now Dr Derv has decided upon bestowing his Pearls of Wisedoom on this Forum. With all due respect and permission of the Mods of this forum. With the vision to make this the most searched sites for Worldy and Spiritual Guidance on the Interweblings, perchance it might be sold for Gazillions to Ooogle or You-Who?

“All ye who heareth… ask and ye shall find the path… the answer… the guidance…”

__________________
Good bye cruel (internet) world.